Big T vs. Little t Trauma: Why Your Experiences Still Matter
One of the most common things I hear in therapy is: “Nothing that bad happened to me… so why do I feel like this?” Many people assume trauma only refers to extreme or life-threatening experiences. But trauma is often much more nuanced than that. Not all trauma looks obvious. And not all trauma comes from […]
Why the Therapeutic Relationship Matters More Than You Think
When most people think about therapy, they picture coping skills, advice, worksheets, or deep conversations about childhood. And while those things can absolutely be helpful, research consistently shows that one factor matters more than almost anything else in therapy: The relationship between the therapist and the client. Not the perfect technique. Not a worksheet. Not […]
“I’m Fine” Isn’t a Coping Strategy: What I’ve Learned Working With First Responders
First responders are often the people everyone else leans on during the worst moments of their lives. They walk into emergencies while everyone else is trying to get out. They stay calm under pressure, make impossible decisions quickly, and carry experiences most people will never fully understand. And yet, many first responders have spent years […]
People Pleasing: Where It Comes From and How to Start Challenging It
“I just don’t want to upset anyone.” If you’ve ever said this (or thought it), you’re not alone. People pleasing is often misunderstood as simply being “nice” or “accommodating.” But underneath it is something much deeper – something rooted in safety, connection, and learned patterns. Let’s unpack where people pleasing comes from, and more importantly, […]
“No” Is a Full Sentence
If you’ve ever said no and then immediately followed it with a long explanation, you’re not alone. “I can’t, I’m just really busy right now…”“I would, but I have so much going on…”“Maybe another time?” On the surface, it can look polite. Considerate, even. But underneath that over-explaining is often something else: a discomfort with […]
Migraines Aren’t “Just Headaches”: The Invisible Struggle No One Talks About
This morning, I had a migraine. The kind where you’re lying in bed with a cold cloth on your head, trying everything—Advil, Tylenol, water—and nothing even takes the edge off. The kind where you know you’re not functioning… but part of you still feels like you should be. Because migraines aren’t just painful. They’re unpredictable. And […]
Therapist Red Flags: What to Watch For in Therapy (That No One Talks About)
Therapy is supposed to feel safe, supportive, and empowering – but not every therapeutic relationship gets it right. As a Registered Psychotherapist, I’ve seen firsthand how subtle red flags can go unnoticed, especially if you’re new to therapy or really want the process to work. So let’s talk about some therapist red flags that don’t […]
Why We Need to Stop Commenting on Pregnant and Postpartum Bodies
Let’s normalize not commenting on pregnant or postpartum bodies “You’re so small!” “You bounced back so fast!” “You look amazing for just having a baby!” These comments are often meant as compliments. But the truth is – they can land in ways you don’t expect. As a therapist and a mom, I want to talk […]
“You Must Think I’m Crazy” – What Your Therapist Is Actually Thinking
If you’ve ever sat in a therapy session and said, “You must think I’m crazy,” you are not alone. In fact, I hear this all the time. And I want to gently pull back the curtain on what’s actually going through your therapist’s mind in that moment – because I promise you, it’s not what you think. […]
Why Talking About Your Problems Isn’t Always Helpful (And What to Do Instead)
You’ve probably heard this before: “Just talk about it – you’ll feel better.” And sometimes, that’s true. But as a therapist, I want to offer a different perspective: Talking about your problems isn’t always helpful – especially when your nervous system is overwhelmed. If you’ve ever found yourself going over the same issue again and […]