Losing it all. Job Loss.
You can lose virtually anything, things, loved ones, friends, your wifi password. You can lose things for a short while like your car keys, or forever, like a loss of a life. Some of these things we lose are mere inconveniences, car keys, wallet, your place in a book, but these losses likely don’t feel as though they define you as a person. Some losses can feel like you are losing a piece of you.
Sometimes parts of our life can start to feel like they are a part of you. We can begin to form attachments to the titles we hold, Parent, Volunteer, Job Title, etc. When we lose our title we can begin to wonder who we are now that that is gone. *Today’s article will be related to job loss. For more resources on other related topics please leave them in the comments.
What does a job mean
A job to many people is much more than a title. That title is how they feed themselves and their families. It is how they provide, and how they spend a great amount of their days.
Today people spend 8, 10, 12 or more hours a day working, in an office or at home. It is often hard to find any separation of who we are outside of work.
Even when we do finally leave our desks and leave our work behind us, in our social life we are often bringing it up. When we meet someone new it is common to ask: “What do you do?”. When out with friends and family: “How is work going?” “Did that big presentation go?” “I heard you were up for a promotion!”
Quickly it is as if our whole life is being penetrated by what we do for work rather than who we are. It can seem like your whole worth is attached to what you do as a job. People getting close to you for free, medical, legal or financial advice, advice for their kids’ development and education, or how their living room flows with the rest of the house.
This can get old quickly. It can also meanthe hold your job has on you is much greater than you had imagined when you took the position. What worth will you have to others in your life if you lose this job? What worth will I have to my spouse, children, parents or friends if I am no longer director of Marketing, Charge Nurse, or CFO?
Unfortunately every job can be taken away at some point – be it budget cuts, being fired, retirement, or the choice to quit. Even when it is your choice it can still be difficult to not only decide it is your time to leave but to decide where you go from here.
During the pandemic many jobs were lost due to cutbacks and businesses having to close their doors for good. Employees who one day had a stable job with a promising future were laid-off and told to go home and wait and the waiting never ended.
If you lost (or left behind) a position it can be very difficult to determine what your life may look like now. You may be left with emotions of grief, distress, sadness, you may have a sense of trauma associated with that event. You may also feel relief, like a weight has been lifted, you may be in awe and in shock from the situation. Whatever emotions you are feeling it is important you process it. Your feelings are valid.
Loss can open many doors, doors you may not have been expecting to find or to have opened to you.
What’s next for me?
If you are struggling after the loss of a job it can be helpful to take time exploring things you used to enjoy. Hobbies you used to have that you lost time for between board meetings and budget reports. Find new hobbies you have been too busy or too scared to try.
When the time comes (a few days, weeks and months down the line) and it is time to make the next move for your career, take time to imagine what your dream job would look like. What did you want to be when you were little? What part of your job did you hate? What parts did you love? What is going to fuel you? And how are you going to avoid losing yourself in your next position?
These are all questions you should ask. Sustaining yourself financially is important but so is who you are at your core and one shouldn’t disturb the other.
If you need help adjusting after the loss of a job (or otherwise) you can reach out for a free consultation with one of our team members to help with the process.